I can tuck mytits in my pants
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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