and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
