For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
