Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
