wrigley field is MILF paradise
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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