Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Randomize
