I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
