Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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