bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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