I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
