Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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