Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
