Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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