somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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