Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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