I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Fuck appropriateness.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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