Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
