Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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