for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
