so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Of course I have a pirate flag
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
