I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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