I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
My pussy is not your playground.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
What a dumb baby whore.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Randomize
