I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
