nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
