We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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