you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
