The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
