Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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