i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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