On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
