i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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