This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Welp...herpes.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
