worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
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