There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
