its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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