Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize
