ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
