There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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