I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
