When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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