So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
