Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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