There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
