Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Terrible idea I love it
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
