I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
My liver just had a heart attack.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
