There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I checked into jail on foursquare
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
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