Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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