i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
