dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
