Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Acid is not a monday night drug
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
